Welcome to The Novatologist

Novato's (empty and defunct) movie theatre looks presentable when the neon's been dusted.

Welcome, gentle reader, to the inaugural post of, "The Novatologist," a fearless chronicle of the trials and tribulations of Novato, California, a rather mundane little California town that means well. The city fathers (and mothers, apparently) envisioned Novato as a, "bedroom community," where folks live, commuting to San Francisco for work. This is a dated view, however, as many Novatans now either work from home, commute to Marin or Sonoma or Napa counties -- or are unemployed, which seems to be the most common occurrence. Many Novatans have been here for many years, if not their entire lives, and in some cases, it shows. This is typical of Small Town, USA.

Like much of Marin County, Novato is where wild and sexy and carefree San Francisco singles (many of whom grew up in Marin) eventual pair up and settle down, as no one really wants to raise kids in the city. Novato itself features the, "magic triumvirate," of Whole Foods, Trader Joes and Starbucks, which at least makes it livable, if not real estate-ingly desireable (with the addition of CostCo). However, corporations that prey on the Marin populace feel that everyone in Marin is rich, at least they reflect this notion in the prices for gas, food, etc. The Novatologist was visiting another, more modest California county, north of Novato, where he visited a Costco for whatever reason, and was SHOCKED at how much cheaper everything was. Prices were 40% higher at the Novato Costco. When the Novatologist mentioned this to the manager of the Novato Costco, he shrugged and said, "It's Marin," a big SCREW YOU to Novato locals, who are typically of more modest means.

Demographically speaking, Marin is indeed more affluent than say, Oklahoma, but that's truer of Southern Marin, home to Mill Valley, Ross, Belvedere and Tiburon, where older Barbies drive silver Mercedes and can wait in line for about three seconds before sighing forcefully and looking at their watches. Novato is the Northernmost part of Marin County, which at times feels about two hours south of the Arctic Circle, but the people are ostensibly more, "normal," whatever that means, and can wait in line (or "on line" if they're from Boston) much longer. Perhaps up to something like EIGHT minutes before bursting into flame. Ontologically speaking, that five minute delta can make all the difference in the world.

The Novato clocktower that Novatans paid a mint to have moved 15 feet.